Chicago demands one dollar bills

Chicago taught me that anybody can ask for money, no matter how small a favor they do you. If a guy is juggling in a subway station and you happen to look at him, you owe him a dollar. If a man takes your suitcase out of the trunk once your taxi stops and you didn't even ask him to, you owe him a dollar. It's like people think I'm made of generosity and small bills.

And that makes ME want to do stupid shit so I can get all my goddamn dollars back. I'll learn how to ride a unicycle and then go around town on my one wheel demanding money for my unique trick.

I also thought about inventing a counterfeit money machine that only makes one dollar bills, but that's stupid because you should at least make 20s. Also giving homeless people fake money is really mean.

By the way, you owe me a dollar for reading this.

(Bed.)