Gnome with a speech impediment checking IDs

Dominick's is a place in Ann Arbor which serves sangria outdoors. Generally, it is wonderful.

However, there's one guy at Dominick's that scares the piss right out of me. On your way in, they check your ID, and sometimes you get this guy with a bulbous gnome nose and glasses. And try as you might, but you cannot understand a goddamn thing he says.

One day I went there with Amy, and she walked right past the guy. So he checks my ID and barks something at Amy, then makes small talk with me while she's on her way over.

'Hibbity gibbity dye dee?' he laughs.
'Yeah,' I return, smiling politely.

Well, turns out he just jokingly asked me if she had a fake ID, so when Amy shows him her license, he starts quizzing her on it. And since you can't understand a fucking thing he says, she had trouble answering questions about herself. I hate that guy.

(work.)

Their dialogue went something like this:
'Oogity backa wonka wonk?'
'I, uh, don't know.'
'Blurrga haaaah!'

So then she looked like a liar, he looked like a scary gnome, and I looked like a guy who hangs out with liars and gnomes. It was bad.

Sipping sangria at Dominick's is like drinking heaven in little jars, and you don't care that one day they're going to run out of heaven, because now you're drunk.