Little fortune tellers, those balls

Good morning! Now go back to bed.

There is something unsafe about waking up at 6am for a 7am shift at work. I know this is a fact because I can feel it in my balls.

If there is danger ahead, like you're about to go into a haunted house or there's a cool breeze that day, your balls take shelter. They cling for warmth and for dear life, and you know it because it's a little awkward to walk. That's your genitals saying 'Go back to bed where it's warm and I can relax.'

Ladies, if you need a danger report, borrow a friend's scrotum. Little fortune tellers, those balls are.

(Roving, whilst clinging to myself.)