Diarrhea milkshakes for your loved one

Sometimes your girlfriend is going to feel down. Now, you can ask her to talk about her problems, many of which cannot be solved with words, OR you can comfort her by talking about poop and farts. Guess which one I use.

I believe the term I found most reliable was 'diarrhea milkshake,' used in the phrase, 'Aww, sweetie, why don't you have a diarrhea milkshake to make you feel better?'

So guys, if your woman's feeling down, just talk to her about combining nasty poop with ice cream. That takes the problem from, 'Life is sad sometimes' to 'That's fucking disgusting. Please don't talk about diarrhea milkshakes.' And come on, it's a funny, so she'll probably laugh.

If she doesn't, dump her. She must respect the diarrhea milkshake. Or drink one.

(bed.)

One of these days I'm going to run a tally on how many away messages revolve around poop, farts, and/or butts.