Mouthful of sadness

If a friend tells you he's eating at a banquet, you think, 'oh, that's something special.' But then you pause and realize they said they were eating something made by Banquet, you think, 'oh, he's just broke.'

The biggest difference between banquet food and Banquet food is about 8,000 grams of sodium per serving. Apparently sodium chloride is the cheapest of the chemical compounds, so Banquet saves you money by swapping out all nutrients with fat and salt, and you don't know the difference because you're poor.

Mmmmm. Every chicken nugget tastes like Dad losing his job all over again.

(Banquet, but not a banquet.)