Dictionary words and oral sex from Hitler

Here's a conversation with a fan from yesterday:

siickbiiitch: haha emo fuckkers are usally sxe haha with pants so tiight their balls cant breath oo man their funny to watch
J aCkAs Skid: they have too many feelings
siickbiiitch: wtf? how the hell can u have to many feelings
siickbiiitch: they just use like dictonary words to describe thier feelings
J aCkAs Skid: um, most words are in the dictionary

...

siickbiiitch: like the word apathetic....who the hell uses that in everday speech
J aCkAs Skid: well, today I got drunk and used the word "allegory"
J aCkAs Skid: so I guess it depends on your level of education
siickbiiitch: lmao...allegory? i dont even know what that means
J aCkAs Skid: yeah, that one's hard

I haven't updated my website in over 18 months and I still get IMs like this. If I didn't love anonymous praise, I'd hate these people.

(Work, 3-11.)

That guy complimented my balls off before complaining about stuff unintelligibly. Just clarifying that he was a fan before he was an angry typo-monger.

So here's the deal with the love/hate comment.

People will IM me and give me praise for my eternally unupdated website, then they'll present some of the worst grammar, spelling, and conversation I've ever seen. Suddenly, I'm torn. I think these people are retarded, yet they love me. They're like confused puppies that love the big, upright-walking human with the fancy computer words. And that human (He's me!) is allergic to dogs. At least the dumb ones.

It'd be like Hitler going down on you. Man, that feels good, but at the same time, I HATE YOU, HITLER.

By the way, from now on, whenever someone uses a big word I'm going to yell at them for using a "dictionary word." I suggest you do the same.