She'd buy, like, a million houses

Yesterday some BDubs, me 'n the other dudes were talking about what we'd do if we had all the money we'd ever need.

Just then, three girls asked to sit at our table until they could find their own. We said sure, have a seat, and then asked our question.

The prettiest of the girls said, 'I'd buy, like, a million houses, and a car, and I'd buy a hot guy, and -'
'Whoa,' I stopped her. 'You'd buy a hot guy. As in, you'd buy a slave?'
'Whatever, I'd be rich,' she replied cuntishly.
'Oh.'

People, she'd buy a million houses. That way, over the course of her life she could visit several hundred of her houses a day. She'd spend a few minutes at each house, then move on to the next. This life of constant travel and slave ownership sounds AWESOME.

(work.)

I'm bothered whenever I realize that a person fits a stereotype. Within seconds, The Housemonger described above dashed any possibility of shocking me with any of that, um... What do you call it when you think of stuff on your own? Oh yes, original thought. I know for a fact that you can be in a sorority and think for yourself, but Housemonger and her buddies Genericface and Thyroid Problem must not have time to do that between following others and putting out to strangers.

So we let the girls sit at our table while they waited to swoop in a freshly vacant table purely because:

1. They weren't horribly ugly.
2. We had the seats open.
3. Vaginas!

As soon as the question left my mouth and went into Blondie's ear, her eyes got wide with excitement.

"How much money do I have?"
"Enough to do whatever you want."
"Like, how much?"
"To the point where money is no longer an object."
"So, like, billions?"
At this point I thought breaking my glass of beer over her face, but beer's expensive, so I held back.
"Sure, you have billions."

Then, instead of telling us about her plans to find spiritual enlightenment in her free time, she basically said, "I'd buy everything, like, ever. Also, there'd be slaves." Good thing she didn't come off as shallow or anything.

Then the girls talked about their pledge class and Thyroid Problem told us about a song she'd written about her sorority (A parody of a popular song. Genius!) while Genericface thought about shampoo. They ordered waters (which none of them really drank), looked for an empty table, then left without leaving anything for the waitress. The waters were free, but come on, ladies, don't be assholes.

In conclusion, those girls sucked. The end.