80,000 kiloboobs

So my slave drive is officially dead. This means I am out 200 gigs of movies, music, and pornography. That's about 10 hours of cinema, 50 hours of music, and about 80,000 kiloboobs.

If I told my mom that my slave drive died, she'd get all concerned and think her son runs a slave trade. But if I ran a slave trade, do you think I'd be so broke all the time? Of course not. Slaves = big business.

Men may read this and think, 'hey, I could use someone to do my pyramid-building homework.'

Women, however, know better than to buy someone they can confine for all eternity. Oh no, they can just get married.

Well, I've referenced ancient Egypt and insulted the institution of marriage. I can go eat now.

(Dinner.)

If Maxtor, the brand of my dead hard drive, had a mouth, I'd tell it to eat cockroaches, because it is a jerk.