Prisoner art gallery

There are art shows where all the paintings on exhibit are done by convicted felons. If I ran one of those art galleries, I'd change it up a bit.

'Oooh, that's the most gorgeous landscape I've ever seen. But what're those words in the corner?'
'That's the artist's name and what he's convicted for.'
'So what'd this guy do?'
'Well, reading the small print on the corner of this painting, we find that this man owned a veal farm and took liberties with the little calves. He's in here for life, as sodomy laws get harsher when it's with baby animals.'
'Oh. Then who painted that ugly little unicorn near over there?'
'Hmmm. Well, this one says the artist's a serial jaywalker.'
'A what?'
'A serial jaywalker. He illegally crossed streets. A lot.'
'Oh, well, when's he get out?'
'Painting says next month.'
'I'll take it!'

(Exam.)

I don't care how breathtaking a painting of a majestic forest is. Nobody wants it if it's been created by a murderer and/or rapist. Just thought I'd throw that out there in case anybody plans on going on a killing spree and then becoming the next Rembrandt.