LAN parties and sexism

LAN parties are great because there won't be any girls there. I mean, I like girls. Heck, I'm even dating one. But when one is around, you can't fart freely, or use swears, or talk about how women are stupid.

I mean, it's all compensatory. Women make us feel dumb all the time 'cause they're all 'wash your hands, comb your hair,' and we just look lazy when you tell us to do the things we should be doing anyway. So we play computer for hours and occasionally say 'bitches make me food' or something, but it's only because we're sexist. And hungry.

So, bitches, I'm at a LAN party, so do my laundry and get pregnant.

I only say that because you make me nervous and my pants are dirty.

(Computers.)

LAN party truths

LAN parties, in a word, are fucking sweet.

Tonight I learned:
-I am probably better than you at UT2k4. You will cry and I will make some comment about you liking dog balls. Deal with it.
-Girls at LAN parties are usually sad and/or bored, so unless your girlfriend is special, send her off to buy sandals or some shit while you frag.
-If Call of Duty is any indication, WW2 was fought by waiting for the Axis forces to stop camping like assholes.

and last but not least, my Mr. T. in Your Pocket keychain sound machine taught me this:
Don't gimme no back talk, sucka.

Hope you all have a nice night. Quit your jibber jabber.

(Bed.)